V-Day

Ah, Valentine's Day. I find myself conflicted as ever by this strange day. While I have no problem at all with people wishing to express their feelings for another, I do wonder why so much fuss is made over one little day.

I don't really celebrate Valentine's Day. Haven't for years, ever since a well-meaning ex took me out for a 'romantic' meal. We sat approximately three centimetres away from the next couple because the restaurant had separated the tables into as many 'dinner for two' arrangements as possible and there simply wasn't enough space. Not very romantic when you can hear everyone else's conversations. So I have made it very clear ever since that I do not do Valentine's Day meals. Or presents. As cute as they may be, I don't need a teddy holding a heart. I don't want naff novelty gifts either thank you. I probably wouldn't say no to flowers but I don't think there needs to be a special day for that. I'd accept flowers any day :-)

My BF is not the romantic sort. Well, not in a traditional way. He's never given me flowers, which makes me a bit sad, cos I quite like flowers. We did exchange cards today (mine has a cupcake on it. Full marks for that), but he does so much for me that maybe other people wouldn't think of as romantic. It's the little every day things that count, isn't it? And I don't really need the flowers...

The thing that bugs me the most about Valentine's Day is that it's so commercial. It's all about getting the perfect card with exactly the right words in it. The perfect gift which sums up your feelings. The perfect meal... blah blah blah. It's all built up so much that something is bound to be a disappointment. And the magazines - pushing that perfect look for Valentine's Day, guaranteed to knock his socks off. Pages and pages of lingerie sets to make his jaw drop. (If you give in and buy one of these it is destined to end up hardly worn, stuffed to the back of the drawer because the lace is that super itchy kind or because suspender belts are way too fiddly to bother with). Why all the effort for one day? Surely if you love someone you tell them every day anyway and do something to show that you love them?

One of my best Valentine's Days was a few years ago when me and my GBF were both single. We went out to a V-Day themed night at a bar and spent the whole night ignoring everyone else! Brilliant. People say that being single on V-Day sucks but it doesn't have to. It's a state of mind. I guess if you're unhappily single (or recently dumped) then it must seem like the Worst Day Ever. Especially with loved up folk going around all smoochy and doe-eyed. But the best remedy in my humble opinion is to shake and shimmy it off :D

I've been avoiding Facebook today. I took a look earlier and was confronted with some seriously soppy messages. I just have this thing where I think that stuff is private between people and I don't want to read how much you lurve your partner. It's too much information sometimes! It's nice that you're happy, really it is. But tone it down, I mean it's a public place, for goodness sake. I myself am very happy with the BF, but I'm not about to write gushing paragraphs about it for you nosey lot to read ;-)

Also, I was reading up on the St Valentine that all this nonsense is supposedly based around, and there doesn't appear to be any reference any where to him being associated with romantic gestures. He seems to have been a Christian persecuted by Roman Emperor Claudius II who tried to force him to become a pagan. Valentine refused and instead attempted to convert the emperor to Christianity. When this failed, Claudius had him executed. However, before his execution, he is reported to have cured the jailer's daughter of her blindness. Further tales, largely considered to be embellished, tell of Valentine being a priest who refused to abide by a law stating that young men in the Roman army should remain single. Valentine is supposed to have secretly performed marriages for these men. When he was found out, he was arrested. On the night before his execution, the tale tells that he wrote the first 'valentine' to the jailer's daughter, signed 'from your Valentine'. St Valentine's Day is also no longer a recognised festival in the Catholic calendar, and is largely celebrated today because of a poem written by Geoffrey Chaucer, entitled Parliament of Foules (1382), which appears to give reference to the day. By the fifteenth century, the traditions of giving flowers, sweets and handwritten notes known as 'valentines' had come into being.

So there we have it. It's bloody Chaucer's fault. I knew we had more reason to curse him, other than the hours spent in A Level English trying to figure out what on earth the Wife of Bath is about.

Now the history lesson is over, I would like to say - I hope you have a lovely evening, whether you are loved up and going out for one of those overpriced meals where you practically sit on the next couple's laps, or spending the night on your own with a dvd boxset and a huge box of chocs (and even huger glass of vino). I will be spending tonight much the same as any other - making dinner for the BF (sausage and mash with my homemade onion gravy, for any interested parties), and maybe watching a movie. Happy Valentine's Day :-)